HAVING plenty of stiffish prep to do, I didn't think anything more about April fooling that evening. I was late up the next morning and sisn't wake up until aunt looked in.
"Hugh, you're in luck -- a registered letter," she said.
I get registered letters on my birthday and Christmas, but I can't remember having any at other times. It got me out of bed with a jump.
"From Devon -- so it may be from Uncle Charles," said aunt.
He sends me a pound at Christmas and on my birthday, so I ripped that envelope open in record time. I could just use a pound, as there was a circus coming soon, and there was a book I wanted.
Gosh, as my face red when I pulled out a blank sheet of paper, and folded in the middle of it I found a sheet torn from a calendar bearing the word "April" and a large figure 1! It said P.T.O. at the bottom, and on the reverse was typed: "Hugh. April Fool. Hugh."
Aunt Jane saw the joke, but I'm afraid I snorted. Archie! I suddenly remembered that his father had a portable typewriter that Archie uses secretly. Very, very funny. I laughed dutifully, and guessed that poor old Sue would probably have a similar registered letter, the envelope disguisedly typed by Archie. He has a cousin in Devon, and I must admit that Archie must have taken trouble over the prank.
Seriously thinking of one back on Archie, I washed and hurried down to breakfast, where I found a hollow egg in my cup.
I had only just finished breakfast when there came a knock at our door. Opening it, I saw Archie on the step.
"In funds?" he grinned.
"Funds?" I said vaguely, remembering the registered envelope.
"Didn't you have a registered letter?" he said, surprised.
"Christmas and birthdays. But I'm not such a mugh I think this is either Christmas or my birthday, Archie," I said easily. "It's April the First."
"Oh," he said, and his face fell. "Well -- listen, Hugh," he went on, lowering his voice. "Play up. This is the joke on Sue. Look."
He showed me a largish book bound in brown paper. On the front was a typed label: "HEADMASTER (Private). Not to be opuned by Boys."
"So what?" I said. "Don't tell me you think that's the way the Head spells 'opened'? Sue will guess -- "
"Shush. I think she's coming out," hissed Archie. "I'm going to kid her that this is the Head's book I've found and am taking to him. It's tied with red tape as you can see."
I could see that all right; but where the joke came in I couldn't even guess, and I said so.
"Listen, ass," he said patiently. "It's a trap for Sue. I know how a girl's mind works."
"First time I've ever known you admit they have minds," I said.
"Oh, stop kidding," he said shortly, "and don't spoil the joke of a life-time. Accidentally-for-the-purpose, I'm going to leave this on the hedge. Sue will spot it. Then what?"
"Search me," I said, puzzled.
"Why, being a girl, she'll be eaten up with curiosity. As it says 'Not to be opened by boys,' what will she do? Open it, and then -- zip! Up comes the golliwog with a screech."
Actually there was more than a mere golliwog in that booby-trap book, but I didn't know that then; he didn't like to tell me that it would shower out soot, as I mightn't agree to help him.
As explained, it seemed pretty silly, but I agreed to back him up! I asked him to wheel out my bike while I picked up my books -- but while he went to the shed at the back, I darted to the gate and moved his bike into Sue's gateway next door. This was my chance for an April fool joke! Sue saw me and giggled.
I was back in the house before Archie appeared again, and then Sue came forward.
"Morning, boys," she said chirpily.
"Morning," said Archie with unusual affability. "Gosh -- nearly forgot the Head's book, Hugh!"
He snatched up the book which he had put on the ground, and I saw Sue look at it curiously, just as Archie meant her to.
"You'd get into a row," I warned him. "Thought you had to take that to the Head?"
"I have," said Archie solemnly, "but I shan't forget it."
He walked to the gate, and then put the book on the hedge, winking at me as he fixed cycle clips. Then he walked out into the roadway. He acted it quite convincingly, really.
But all was suddenly changed. He looked for his bike, and goggled.
"Gosh! My bike!" he yelled. "It's gone -- "
"Gone?" gasped Sue. "Oh, no! But -- but that wasn't your bike a boy went riding past on a minute ago, surely?"
Archie turned pale.
"What was he like? Which way did he go?" he panted.
"Down the road," said Sue. "A dark boy with glasses."
"Hmm, that sounds like Stukeley," I said, hiding a grin as I saw the fury in Archie's face.
"Stukeley! On my bike! If this is his idea of a joke," howled Archie. "Gosh! I can't walk to school in time. This isn't funny!"
Sue chortled with laughter at his wild expression, and then said he could borrow her bike. Archie, in fury, said he couldn't ride a girl's bike, and forgot to be grateful. Then, when he was getting wildly excited, Sue wheeled out his bike with a cheery "April Fool."
She was carrying a bunch of flowers, and Archie snorted in disgust, eager to turn attention back to her.
"Huh. Flowers for the mistress, eh?" he said. "Oh, my dear Sue," he mocked. "How sweetly they smell."
Then he took a great sniff and sneezed a dozen times.
"Atishoo! Atishoo!"
Sue shrieked with laughter, and Archie snatched at the flowers. When he had snatched them he couldn't let go because the paper had sticky stuff on it -- and anyway the flowers were dead. Sue had scattered snuff all over them and didn't care what happened to them now.
Archie said not a word. Furiously he tore at the flowers, trying to get the sticky stuff off his hand. At last he managed it. He mounted his bike and pedalled off.
"There!" said Sue in triumph. "I knew he couldn't take a joke."
"Archie!" I yelled, riding after him. "Got the Head's book?"
He didn't seem to hear, and I didn't hear Sue call out -- although I knew she did. Archie put on speed, and I put on speed, too, both determined to get well ahead of Sue, for I felt it was his turn.
"Anyway," he muttered as I caught him up, "who laughs last laughs loudest. And just wait until she opens thaht book. Just wait."
He dismounted at the corner and waited in order not to miss Sue. We both waited. But Sue didn't appear. Time passed, and I looked at my watch. We dared not wait any longer for fear of being late, and in a rather sulky mood, Archie at last rode on. He hadn't had his laugh.
"She's gone the other way," he frowned. "Didn't want us to see her with soot all over her face."
"Soot?" I exclaimed, alarmed. "Gosh! That wasn't a soot booby-trap, that book?"
"It was. Hollow, filled with soot that flies up directly the tape's untied," he grinned. "That taught her a lesson all right. Curiosity killed the cat. Ha, ha!"
Of course, the trouble with these jokes is knowing where to draw the line. Archie said he knew; but I could see he didn't. I couldn't help wondering if poor old Sue really had got her face covered with soot. If so, she would have to stay to wash again, and that would make her late for school. It was beyond the limit.
Matter of fact, I was pretty mad with Archie, and we rode most of the rest of the way to school in silence. We got there in time and, in fact, with more time to spare than we had thought, so it was a shock when I heard a prefect calling us.
"Wiles," he called curtly, "I've been calling you for the last few minutes." He held out a folded piece of paper to Archie. "A girl asked me to give you this. Said it was important. If it's a silly April Fool joke, you can tell her from me that prefects don't run juniors' errands. But she seemed a bit agitated, so I brought it."
"Phew!" I breathed with sudden intuition as the prefect walked away. "Sue!"
Archie opened the note, and his cheeks were drained of colour. His eyes seemed to bulge. Almost at once he went deep red, and looked scared.
"Doesn't look like a joke," said the prefect, frowning as he noticed these signs. "Not bad news, I hope."
"In a - - way," said Archie. "Y-yes."
"Oh! Sorry. If you have to go home again you can report to the Head," said the prefect. "Oh, no -- nunno, thank you," muttered Archie. "I -- I'll be all right."
When the prefect had gone, Archie gave me a stricken look.
"What's wrong?" I asked. "Is it from Sue?"
I just couldn't guess what message she could have sent that would have this effect on Archie. If she had been covered in soot, as I guessed she must be, nothing she could say in anger or reproach would make Archie look so scared - unless she had told her mother, or her mother had found out, and had threatened to report Archie. But Sue wouldn't have allowed that. Sue is no sneak.
"Well, what is it? Show me," I said.
I took the brief note and read it. It was from Sue.
"Silly chump, Archie," it ran. "But don't worry, Book sent to Head. Thank me when we meet - - Sue."
I looked at Archie; he looked back at me.
"She - - she's sent it to the Head!" he gulped. "Gosh! It can't be true! If the Head opens it - - and he will - - gosh! All that soot. And he'll find out who - - who made the thing. He - - he'll never believe I didn't mean it for him. That ninny Sue must have given that prefect, Morley, the book for the Head and the note for me!"
No wonder he was scared! What chap wouldn't have been? For the Head can be a stern type, and never likes stepping into booby traps, or having soot hurled in his face.
Click on the image below to go to chapter three
II
